the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
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I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
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Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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