just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Can you bring me the toilet please
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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