you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
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when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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