hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
