Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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