I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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