Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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