new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
