But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize