I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Randomize