WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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