Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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