Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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