wakey wakey hands off snakey
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
