it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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