you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
