You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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