Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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