I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
