That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize