yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
The beers last night were like the tears from god
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
