she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
