Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
