I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
