Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
