I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
i will never coherently bang her
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
