Tell her she can't have a vagina
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize