Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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