No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
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