Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
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