I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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