Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
i wish my penis had a tongue
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
