she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
