There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
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I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
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It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
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