maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize