But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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