New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
not ubering you a puppy
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize
