What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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