margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
We just shotgunned beers for America
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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