There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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