dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
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