i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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