you guys were way drunker than both of me
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize