he puts the penis in happiness.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
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