Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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