So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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