so explain again why im purple
no
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I'm passing your future prison.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
