So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
