he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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