The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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