Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
P.S. I can't hear my feet
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
